I got free college; everyone else deserves it too.
I usually started every other morning of the week with AP Chemistry, but before the class period began, my teacher, Ms. Scott, told me she needed help with a task later on. As my peers headed to the back of the classroom to perform a lab, I stayed in the front.
She handed me an envelope and told me to send it to the principal’s office, so I grabbed it and walked down.
When I arrived, I handed it to the principal, Dr. Aitch. She opened the envelope and grabbed a black pen from inside. Her face scrunched with a shot of confusion as she threw the pen on the desk.
Here is what you are really here for, she said.
She opened the door to a room on the side of the main office. A mix of teachers from my high school and honor’s college advisors from the University of Missouri-St. Louis stood inside congratulating me. The mascot, Louie the Triton, stood inside wielding a huge check. It was my first time bawling tears of joy.
I got the scholarship.
During that week, depression consumed me. I remember it being particularly heavy earlier that day. I struggled with it for years (and I still do) but learning that I received the scholarship gave me a lot more relief.
Ever since elementary school, my mother reminded my sisters and me to get full scholarships if we wanted to attend college. Otherwise, we could not afford it, we were told. My mother worked a low-wage job, and my father was rarely a part of our lives except via some backlogged child support payments and healthcare.
Much of my youth was spent stressing over academics and striving to be a top student, often at the expense of my social and mental well-being. The fear of being unable to afford college and, thus, unsuccessful was instilled in me.
While I am grateful for my scholarship, I recognize that I was mostly lucky. Many other worthy students applied for the same scholarship. But only about five students would receive it. Those entering the second stage of the scholarship process, at least a hundred, were promised financial aid for the first year even if they did not become finalists. But even before that stage, there were many more students whose applications were sifted through and analyzed. I could have easily been turned down in that early stage.
During high school, a therapist once bragged about how he was able to afford college and an apartment with only a part-time job. Those were different times. Meanwhile, the minimum wage has remained the same while other prices increased. This includes the bloated costs of college. Students hoping to go to college cannot simply work it off. If they cannot win the scholarship lottery or are ineligible, they often have to rely on loans.
My college experience allowed me to build meaningful relationships with mentors and friends. It also gave me the chance to organize around common interests while discovering new ones. For example, I organized a secular group on campus because I wanted to provide nonreligious students and our allies with alternate forms of community, but I also wanted to connect students to a variety of resources such as therapy and housing.
Nonreligious people, especially those from marginalized ethnicities, are very likely to face discrimination — sometimes from their own families. Some fear the risk of estrangement while they are being their genuine selves. The same is true for LGBTQ+ folks. This can mean financial and housing insecurity. Thanks to my scholarship, I stayed in school after becoming estranged from my own family in 2020. However, my peers facing similar circumstances were not always as lucky.
Free college means liberation. And this type of liberation lifts up the whole of society.
Due to my background, I advocate for fully state-funded public colleges. Accessing education should be a priority for our state and our country.
I want a future where money is not a barrier to education. A future where public universities are much like public libraries which are open to all who want to learn. A future where we can compete with the increasingly global market.
Sure, I was lucky. But luck cannot solve systemic issues. Only systemic solutions can do that.
